Hello. Sorry, but i am here to vent my anger. Skip this if you are not interested.
Damn You! I've been trying to put up with you as though i have no comment or anything.
But in my mind you are just another irritating pest. I wonder why you are invited to my life,
or should i say to our life. Please leave for good. I hate you leaving foot prints in our life.
If you continue as you are like that, one day, i believe one day, i dont care if you willl complain to her, being a cry baby and complain how hurtful my words are to you,
I swear i will blurt whatever is in my mind, out infront of you, right at you, let you know how irritating you sentences are to me, how bhb your sentence were to you.
Sorry but i think i cant take your crap any longer. Thank you for your understanding.
Love both my loves.
Thank you, muackx.
When life is about to change for the better.
Possibilities. ;DD
Hi. Stay home all day, watching tv, rotting.
Nothing to do at all. What a life.
Hmm.. should i put it as peace, or lonely.
LOL. Felt happy that the tv is mine, lonely to watch alone.=x
I'm so obssesed to the new show debut this tuesday, named litttle nyonya=p
No outing, nothing to post. Hmm..
Hi. Was damn tired today. Yea i mean tired.
Yesterday night was chatting all the way. Suddenly, out of the blue, so many people come and talk to me.
When i onlined, was sianing at first. Then after nudging kelvin cheong, then people start talking to me consecutively.xp
Not boosting, just happy=d
And bla bla bla, chatted all the way till 1, then disconnected. I suppose the reason behind, is that the owner is geting tired for waiting for the internet to load.xp
Awhile after, slack around then went to bed. It was around 2.
This morning i woke up by a bad dream. Not as vivid in my mind, but i think there is images of hx and LUU. Can't remember what's the story.=E
Was late for work.=x So i dashed out of the house.
Miinutes later, when i'm waiting for train, mom msged and reminded me, i forgot to bring money along..
I was like, LOL. ALright, Who am i? i'm cat. I can find food just like that. *snap finger*
Ha. Oh crap.
I apologized to aunty and started by arranging the files. Then aunty ask me to pack for sec 1's stationery. Which included graph book, graph pad, A3 sketch book and bla bla bla.
I run here run there to get those stuff. What else? Ended up with bruises, for my carelessness. The books and files were so evil. THEY scratches me here and there. Almost cry there.
No way i'm gonna cry. i'm strong, you see.=D Lady luck is still around as aunty did not see that=x
Then hours passes and i'm getting berry tired, and starving.Around 12, aunty asked whether i'm hungry. "Ofcoz i'm not! I'm on diet!" yea right.
Aunty is berry caring. She asked if i wanted hers' but ofcoz not. She keep asking.. Good, don't she?
Okok, then i saw jun lin, christ and rebecca ng yin ling and their church friend, if i'm not wrong. I really hate to say that but her church is the most........ I've ever seen. IT CHANGES A PERSON'S PERSONALITY. From good to bad, bad to worst. NO i'm serious. Pardon me if you felt offended. But seriously, i can see the changes you know?
My sis told me that, and i felt that too. Ok, stop here. Cannot let other's influence my personality. =X
Then after that around 2, i thought it's 3. I started to pack up. Coz i was like, abit light-headed.
Then i'm wonderring why aunty is doing her things like time have not been moving. Then i sat down and rest, i took my phone out and oo._. It's 2. I was like, AHHH.__.
Then i went back to the file arrangement and start arranging.
Christ came in few momments later and helped. Bla bla bla. It all ended like this.
oooo nono, one more thing. Today, came one tamil aunty, under financial assis. Under this, money is not needed to buy textbook. Then she first came in without the fom. She started complaining to me that our school office is berry rude. I smiled, nooded, so as to stay polite.
Then aunty came and i say she have no form. Then aunty used a flat tone saying no form no book. She went back to the office and bring the form here. Co-incidentally aunty is not around again, then she started complainning aunty attitude is rude. Then she stopped when aunty came back. She then use a polite tone to talk to aunty. !!!._.?? Then when i double checked with her the books, she asked why some items is not given. Then i explained items recieved in sec 1 will not be provided again. But i think she dont understand, and say i didn't explain properly when aunty came to explain THE SAME THING TO HER! What the..
Today is absolutely below average.
A post specially for her.
Nono, dont tell me, lemme guess..
You're.. hurt, like me.
You're.. missing him, like me.
You're.. Trying to stay strong.
You're.. falling.
You're.. out of your mind.
You've.. run out of idea.
You .. Dont know what to do.
You .. Think that you're alone.
You .. Hate this feeling.
You .. Need someone around.
You .. Just want him.
You .. Are killing your braincells now.
Am i .. Right?
Lemme tell you this, You're my everything now. What i means is, only everything now.
Am i with you now, HOE JIALU?
Hello.
How to start. Ok, start with my phone!
I am thinkng of replacing a new one.
The only function that i liked most about my current phone is that, the alarm never failed to wake me.
Well, actually not so perfect, but at least, out of umpteen times, it failed once or twice.=p
Thats something, Right?(x
Other than this, nothing else work. It black out sometimes too. Kinda sick of it=(
Today, what a day.(;
Went back to school and found it really quiet. Dead silence. Thats the only time i find the cuteness of band=p Then after that bla bla bla. On my way to CWP. Theres a gil, appraoched and ask me whether i am free for a story. Then she started on the jesus story. She explain that we, human were seperated by god, from gods. So, We, wanna be linked to god, but was seperated by a thing called "sin". And bla bla, end of story. Her main point is to make me join their church. Like all of the church stories the same. And i said no, she Seems kinda shock? i have no idea what that expression is. And she ask to exchange num. And thats all.
Bla bla bla. i make my way back home.
OOO, one more thing. If god decides our fate, then wouldn't he be busy? With so many, infinity of us. And if he is, why do he care whether people is believing in him anot? That breaks the purpose of church. Dont you think so? And if god really IS there, why doesn't HE stop HIS own believers from competting with one another, of which is having most believers? Hmm..
Another thing, about previous post's lyrics.. i'm not done yet. Last song. All of them seriously explain how a broken hearted felt, how I felt. Bout him. And him. Yea all bout them, how dull my life is with them around.
Closed off from love, I didn’t need the pain.
Once or twice was enough, And it was all in vain.
Time starts to pass, Before you know it, you’re frozen.
But something happened, For the very first time with you..
My heart melts into the ground, Found something true.
And everyone’s looking round, Thinking I’m going crazy!
But I don’t care what they say, I’m in love with you..
They try to pull me away, But they don’t know the truth..
My heart’s crippled by the vein, That I keep on closing..
You cut me open and I..
Keep bleeding, Keep, keep bleeding love
I keep bleeding, I keep, keep bleeding love..
Trying hard, not to hear.
But they talk so loud..
Their piercing sounds, fill my ears, Try to fill me with doubt.
Yet I know that the goal Is to keep me from falling..
But nothing’s greater Than the rush that comes, with your embrace.
And in this world of loneliness, I see your face,
Yet everyone around me Thinks that I’m going crazy..
maybe, maybe..
I've been lonely for so long, Trapped in the past, I just can't seem to move on
I've been hiding all my hopes and dreams away, Just in case I ever need them again someday
I've been setting aside time, To clear a little space in the corners of my mind
All I wanna do is find a way back into love, I can't make it through without a way back into love
I've been searching but I just don't see the signs.
I know that it's out there, There's gotta be something for my soul somewhere
I've been looking for someone to shed some light, Not somebody just to get me through the night
I could use some direction, And I'm open to your suggestions.
And if I open my heart again, I guess I'm hoping you'll be there for me in the end
There are moments when I don't know if it's real, Or if anybody feels the way I feel
I need inspiration, Not just another negotiation
I'm hoping you'll show me what to do
And if you help me to start again, You know that I'll be there for you in the end..
Sorry, to those whom i've hurt.
爱你的那一个, 伤你的那一个..
谁才是你爱情中的伯乐?
放弃了这一个, 然后等待着下一个..
最后哪一个让你最舍不得?
你让我成长了, 就算是痛得值得..
一个个过客过得快不快乐?
祝你早日快乐.. 离开时别忘了, 看看眼前的人..
流泪记住了, 还是微笑祝福着?
Forgiven, for those that hurt me.
Hi. Past few days nothing to post, kinda miss it, dont cha?xp
I'm not busy at all with my job. I'm enjoying it. Seriously.
Not reckoning the fact that i have to force myself to wake up earlier during the holiday.
Although the pay is less than little, but i still love to serve. I mean my schoolmates.
It's kinda fun to walk around, looking for textbooks.=D
Actually to serve people you know not is definitely better.. Somehow, but none of the aunties wanna hire not-their-school pupils. That is the point, i suppose.
I like to work at bookshops or stores as jab is NOT needed.(x
Don't anyone? I am so-out-of food industries.=p
And what else? i get to know the fact that the young generation now is getting so high up to standard that they will sooner or later be more useful than us. Hmm.. Reality..
Jobs available left KFC and MAC. How boring that will be.
I am craving to watch Twilight! Oh man!
Hello. Nothing much. Tomorrow going to work. My berry first job!
Although the pay is less than little=x
Yesterday night was chatting with LUU on phone and also chatting online.
That petai. Shengjingbing. He berry lame. He say like me, then ask me stead.
He think i so stupid, dont know that he is pranking me?._.
So i screenshot the conversation. Ha. Then in the end he say he is pranking me and bla bla bla.
He say sorry when i told him to visit my blog to see what's new. Ha.
First time talk to luuluu for so long._. And we were like talking craps.
The same topic came to us always. Pushing guys to each other. How lame.
Then remind me of something.
That time STC, when we're preparing for lunch, 3 sir came to our bang. One look quite senior, other 2 look quite handsome._.
Then while the senior-looking one was talking to us, asking me about alfie, who was sick.
The ok-ok looking sir climb up a robe. Using leg and hand.. then his phone drop and another good-looking sir pick it up and say the phone is found by him therefore it belongs to him.
Then they sort of started a "cat fight". Infront of me. Haha, they are like, damn cute. Coz some of us went to wash up after the jetty jump, So the bang left only 3-4 of us. They are busy doing their thingss, so i suppose i am the only one who saw this=x
Then they play play play infront of their cadets._.
If i'm not wrong, they are CI from marsiling sec.
LoL end of story, thank you.
Hello.
Hee=DD
Today went out with hx.
We went around looking for job.
Actually it's me who is lookin for job, She accompany me to go.
School bookshop aunty decided to hire me. For merely 2 days. Not enough!=x
So, we decided to go Woodlands ring sec.=x You know why right?xD
But we dont know how to get there. So we took 912 and roam around.
But since we dont know where is Woodlands ring, we got down when we see the first school in sight. And that is woodlands primary. Ha. The canteen is so cute!!!! It has a name.
" Cafe de wood". Cute isnt it.=p
But we came kinda late. Aunty dont need helper anymore.
Next we dont wanna wste anymore money taking the same bus again, we decided to walk the route the 912 go. And next stop, we ended up in 888 plaza. Hx say she have no idea where is woodlands mart, but her father told her it's near 888. So we give it a try, we walk around 888 plaza, but found nothing. Yea. So we continued our journey to first, we found woodlands ring pri. Again, we decided to give it a try, and we went in. The ansswer is still the same, no.
So we continued walking striaght and yey, we found it.=D
We dont know where the gate is, so we walk 1 big round around the school fence and.. Lol.
We went in the main gate and the security stopped us. We say bookshop and he say the aunty went for lunch and bla bla bla. Ended up like this. Yea. So, what a day.
Hx recommended a job, but i dare not call.=x I think i will do it tomorrow.=D
Thanks Hx. Muackx.
OOO anyway, that petai promised to ask hi school aunty for me=D
Thank you in advance.. You're actually not bad..=x
After just now that quarrel, i found out that you're a dependable person. Tsk tsk. I hardly praise you know=x
Hello.
Finally Audition is available in my PC.
It takes like whole life time to make that damn game work.
And just then that i realized this few days, i online by stealing other's internet,
is to go to his blog, hoping something else will be at there, Refreshing and refreshing over ans over again. How time pass.
Like, finally again, he replied and bla bla bla. Ended up like this.
So, yea.. While waiting, i also played viwawa, kinda hooked. That's not a good thing.
Coz as for some of you out there, you know it's kinda like gambling. But it's a cute gamble game.
It's a game.
I promise, gurantee + Chop, THIS, Will not happen to me in real life. Not ever. Thank you.
Just now went to make my IC. This time it really happened. We've gone to the ICA building.
Went inside and have a silly photo of me. Four of them, to be exact. I look damn "nice"
Yea. But ended up with nothing. Coz i dont have my original Birth cert. So close yet so far. Ha.
Anyway, i supppose i dont wanna online anymore. Maybe. Maybe not? Maybe. Maybe not?
Feeling kinda guilty to have keep on using the same connection from the same person,
Making his/her connection lag. Ha. Imagine you have no idea why your PC is moving lag all of a sudden. And you cat really figure out why.=x
Kinda Funny=pp
Hmm.. Thats all for my day.
Love Whoever is reading this. Muackx.
If you dont want my love, free to go. But you dont have to return me the kiss.
Hi. Another day pass by. Nothing special.
Quite reluctant to post due to a post that i pasted from someone's blog.
I want it to be on top, hoping somehow, HE will visit, somehow, HE get to read it.
But somehow, i know not everything goes as you wish.
Anyway, Friendster is seriously having a problem which make me quite sick of it.
Imagine you waited for so long, looking forward on what's new. And this is the result you get.
Then after refreshing for a fwe times, the page is back to "maintenance".
How irritating friendster is! So, as if like online ghost, roam through the net.
Went to some random blogs and disturb. Hee. Sorry(x
Waited for luu to online today, and when she online, i webcam-ed her=x
She say her modem spoil and not sure when will the day of bright arrive. Ha. That is what i added though. Try to be sarcastic, thats all(:
Haha.
Luu, ILY. ZH, IHY.
Dont have to thank me asshole.
You're making yourself a clone.
Bye dunce. Love ya all. Muackx.
Hi. Today's second post.
Well, for the previous post is just some craps i've came to realize, that trapped me into it till now, it's still bothering me.
Anyway, friendster is currently under maintainance so the bordom is kinda killing.
Luu say jasper called her just now but her mum answered instead. I wonder what happen next and she say she have no idea too. Haa. Hope jasper is fine=x
Still say dont like her, how fake. Call her out for date!=x
And what else? Luu just sent me a nudge and say she blocked me due to me keep nudging her while she is playing audi with HER TKL. DUH.
What a XIAO KE AI she is. Muackx larh.
Just now finally my mom decided to bring me to make my IC then i took like half an hour to prepare. After that i wore my skinny but she say i am insane._.
Scolded for wearing a skinny. After about 2 min drive, mom parked in a parking lot, and start looking for something. I asked she say my letter. I found it and she say read what is written.
Things needed is Birth cert, parent's IC and what else? I have neither. Then she drove back home.
This is my day. It ended with less than 3 min outing. Anyway, it rained just now. That dont bring any good too.
I don't know what you guys feel and think about this Homo Sapien feeling called love but I feel that I am 1001% hopeless in that and I can never understand what true love and love itself truly is.And what's with infatuations man? I seriously hate the feeling of an infatuation and God, please tell me why is it that along with all the damn things in the world you have put into me, you must also place somethings called love, feelings and infatuations into my life? Why must you make me meet that girl in my life? Why? Why? WHY?
I cannot find any GODDAMN, SINGLE, ONE, SOLO word in the dictionary that can describe how I am feeling right now.It's a mixed feeling of confusion, sadness, pain, sorrow, regret, anger and a thought of hoping to be able to get in touch with her.
And there's no one I can turn to for solid advice or just pour my feelings out.All of them either go out of topic or just brushed me off with simple things like "LOL", sarcastic "Good Luck" and "If you fail to get her contacts, I'll laugh till I fall"...
God.I have sinned and I ask for repentence.
God.I have taken things for granted and I daren't do it ever again.
God.I just want that tree out of the whole forest.Just that tree.
God.I just want be with her always.
God.I just want you to hear and fulfill my wishes.
God.I know you give chances for things to happen but I just do not know how to use it wisely.
God.I believe you.
God.Now hear my prayers.
God.I love her.
God.I will never take her for granted should she be mine.
God.I can never ask for anything more than just her alone.
God.No one has ever left an impression as deep as she did on me.
God.I am in pain and sorrow now.
God.Please.Fulfill my wish.
After not long.. And you found your her. Why? how you managed to change so instantly.. She replaced me so.. Lol.. Lost of words.
I.. have been replaced. I always have been.
Aiyo Tsk Tsk Tsk. I never know i am so famous until i went to jialu's blog. But i wont jealous.=X
Jialu went out alone that day, in some alien street which i haven't been to, and found this=p
Haha. But Lulu is more famous than i am.
Anyway, Today plan to go make my IC. But not all plans always go well.
Aiyer! When can i make me own IC! My birthday is already far away and still.! =E
Back from Np STC. HAHA.
Survivor Training Camp.
Ohgod. I tell you,
The camp is like DAMN:
>Tiring
>Boring
>Sianing
>Not Fun
>Dirty
>Itchy!
Really! Ohman. Have to sleep with so many alien insect around, not knowing what they want, IS THE LAST DISGUSTING THING IN MY WORLD EVER.
The Mosquitoe is like Every 5 sec, You can hear their wings flapping. LOL
But the mosquitoe there are quite stupid. Just clap your hand infront of you, you can kill atleast one._.
My group got some hyper people so no worry that i have to speak up. At a corner sianing.
Mr queck berry berry berry bias!
He group Siti rofina with puti! He know theyt are friend.
HE group christine with SHU HUI!
HE GROUP ME WITH ALFI AND SHAHRUL!
#@%@#$%#%^$%^$@#$%# How can he do that?,_,
He say he will seperate all of us, but only seperate hx, jialu and me only. NeverMIND!
Anyway, My group gt a very good guy sial.
He will like, " Eh cathrine, Want biscuit?" "Eh cathrine, want maltene?"
When he gt things to eat.
I very lonely in my group lorh.
When eating time, i will sit there alone, starring at the insects.
Dont feel like eating without friends. Sob.
So i go join hx. Haha. Hx another group larh. Near me only. so i go join her and pavi.
CampFire -
The sec 3 gets high but the sec 2 remain low._.
They reflected how we used to be when we are sec 2 lol.
Sleepy sleepy, Cannot get high de. xD
This year sec 3 is.. CMI.
But Next year sec 3, More.. LOL.
They are so pampered. LOL.
When sleeping first, The tent so small. My tentageall malay girls. So cramped, So hard.
But no worry. My backbone works perfectly.
The mosquitoe comes and go and comes and go. DERRH!
I sit up all night just to put on layers and layers of insect repellent. Jialu ssay veyr Useful. PIGU!
USELESS DE NIA!
Then hx more jialat. Whole arms like dont know what liao. Haha. Ask her put repellent she dont waant.
Last night I berry happy. Coz it rain.
The CIs wake us up in the morning and ask us to move into the hall.
The hall is much much much much more comfortable. Hee=)
The morning PT LIKE WHAT LIKE THAT.
Ask us roll around the field. The insects like damn many. World's most bizzare things. Roll among the insects. Haiix.
And last day! Area cleanning. =D
Most unfair to my group.
My group first have to help dont know which group to clean the tent groudsheet.
After that My group have to clear the hall.=(
Other groups only clear an area, we clear so many.
But then got others to help in the end larh. Coz we took too long to clear.
Fair enough._.
Then jialu group clean toilet! haha!=p
The toilet is seriously very dirty. Lol.
But as expected, jialu told me she did not touch any dirt at all.x)
This is her MARH! Hee.
Ok ok thats all.
Oh, got a war game. All of us was seperated into group of 2. Shengjing bing. Use dirty water splash at each other._. ALALALA! Sian larh that war game.
To a certain someone;
You're no longer consider a friend of mine, but a schoolmate. No longer A playmate, but i passerby.
I did'nt know you're a.. I thought you're just a hypocrite.
Perhaps you are the way you are.
Perhaps the society changed you.
Perhaps You dont consider me as a friend too - or not.
Perhaps people thinks you're cute.
Perhaps people thinks you're cool.
Perhaps people thinks you're a SOMEBODY.
Perhaps you are not anymore.
You're no longer my friend. No longer. Not my friend anymore.
Perhaps i'm childish.
Perhaps i'm sickenning.
Perhaps i'm irritating.
Perhaps you're nothing to me.
Perhaps you're a nobody.
Perhaps you're just insane.
Perhaps the world is insane.
Perhaps you're not a hypocrite -
Perhaps you are, to me.
And still, you're a passerby in my life now. present. Perhaps include the future.
Whatever it is, you're only a hypocrite, no longer my friend. A schoolmate. No longer a playmate. You're never better anymore. You're just a nobody to me. A clone, a joker. A ms popular, perhaps. I dont know and i dont care.((:
Cathrine, 6teen.
Need no further intro.
TEARS -
~ Trying hard not to hear ;
~ Everything that surround ;
~ Ain't Adolescent ;
~ Revealing dissatisfaction ;
~ Sorrow to be hidden .
THAT ' list of desires ' .
Do I need one?(;
~ fly me to the moon.
- DEAD SILENCE .
I don't need that . Speak your mind . (;
- ADIEU.
- VAULT .
June 2007 July 2007 August 2007 September 2007 October 2007 November 2007 December 2007 January 2008 February 2008 March 2008 April 2008 June 2008 July 2008 August 2008 September 2008 October 2008 November 2008 December 2008 January 2009 February 2009 March 2009 April 2009 May 2009 June 2009 July 2009 August 2009 September 2009 October 2009 November 2009 December 2009 January 2010
- MELODY .
